With medical residency interviews in progress, I thought I
would take time to reflect on the quotes that have resonated with me following
my husband though the first years of orthopedic surgery residency. I wish I
could say I have been 100% supportive through his medical journey. We, after
all, started dating at age 15, went to undergrad together and, were long
distance through medical school by 3 and a half hours. The reality is that
being a significant other in the medical community put mildly is tough. If you
are in the significant others club, you know what I’m talking about. I’ve spent
my fair share of his call nights on Pinterest, panning through the motivational
quotes section in our queen size bed with an English Bulldog warming my feet,
German Shepard fit snuggly under the bed, without a husband beside me. My eyes look harshly at the warm glare of my phone screen against the dark background of the bedroom searching
for poetic strength not to take my annoyance at our situation out on him after
he has been at work for 24 hours plus. These sayings have kept me grounded and often shake my negative attitude into a positive one.
1.)
We don’t meet people by accident, they cross our
paths for a reason.
I cannot believe how fortunate we are to have landed in residency in a program
that feels like a family. I would have never thought that my social life would
have been comparable to what it was after leaving all of our friends. Landing residency here was a blessing.
2.)
How lucky am I to have something that makes
saying goodbye so hard. –Winnie the Pooh
Distance from family and friends
makes you realize how many wonderful people are in your life. I am so happy
when I have friends drive so far to see me. The effort alone speaks volumes
about our friendship.
3.)
“I must learn to be content with being happier
than I deserve.” –Jane Austen
I have everything I need.
4.)
“Success is not convenient… it leads to a life
of convenience.”
We live our 20's to work, 30's for family, and 40's to enjoy the fruit of the tree we planted 20 years prior. Intelligence is not just getting an A on a test but realizing that gratification does not have to be instantaneous. Waiting is often against social norms but is in fact acceptable. Long hours = bigger checks someday. Be patient.
5.)
Most women want a man that’s already established.
A strong woman will be a part of his struggle, survive it, succeed together,
and build an empire.
Having a common goal in our marriage makes us stronger.
6.)
The things you take for granted someone else is
praying for.
It’s easy to get caught in the cycle of only noticing how much your
significant other is not home and how much time they might spend studying. It
takes a special strength to not see your husband for the “80 hour work week
rule” (cough cough… 100 hour work week) to then have him come home and retreat
to the basement to read for lecture the next morning. It hard to take care of
the house alone, prep all the food, and keep 2 dogs and a cat from killing each
other while working 50 hours per week. It’s nuts; and I’m pretty impressed at
myself honestly! In the midst of all the crazy, it’s so easy to look around and
forget how nice our first house actually turned out to be, that we have food in
the refrigerator, have money left over at the end of the month, and have a
husband who is working his ass off every day for our family’s future betterment.
7.)
Attitude is the difference between an ordeal and
an adventure.
8.)
Growth happens at the end of your comfort zone.
The most fun I've ever had was because of a situation that made me uncomfortable. Just jump. It all works out in the end.
9.)
Life does not owe you anything. Not happiness,
wealth, power, success, or love. It is your job to create that for yourself.
The more work you put in to anyone of those areas, the more satisfaction
you get out. Staying in does not help any of it. Push yourself to get out and
make new friends. Try new things. If you are lucky enough to be placed area
with people of different backgrounds, use it as a learning experience.
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